Learning to know yourself better through psychology

Self-knowledge is often presented as a key to happiness, good career direction, and personal fulfillment. But what does "knowing oneself" really mean? And how can psychology help us with this? Behind personality tests and calls for personal development lies a rigorous science that explores the mechanisms of our identity and our ways of functioning.

Here are some insights from psychology to help you better understand yourself and navigate life.

Exploring your personality traits to gain self-awareness

Differential psychology studies individual differences through relatively stable traits: extraversion, emotional stability, openness to experience, conscientiousness, and agreeableness. These dimensions influence our behavior, career choices, and relationships with others. Scientifically validated tools allow us to explore these tendencies without rigidly defining them, providing a framework for understanding our functioning and identifying environments more conducive to our success.

Other models exist that highlight our personality preferences, for example: Where do we get our energy? How do we perceive things? How do we make decisions? How do we approach the world?

These models are very widespread today and often used in phases of questioning orientation, career or understanding oneself and one's ways of functioning.

 

Know yourself better thanks to psychology tools

Understanding Your Emotions

Knowing yourself also means learning to identify, name, express, and regulate your emotions. The science of emotions shows us that anger, fear, or sadness are not to be suppressed but to be listened to. They provide information about our needs and limits. Understanding them better helps improve our relationships and decision-making.

Emotional intelligence (EI) refers to the ability to recognize, understand, express, and regulate one’s own emotions, as well as those of others, in order to guide thoughts and behavior. Popularized by Daniel Goleman, it is based on five key skills:

• Self-awareness: identifying what you feel and why

• Self-regulation: managing impulses, stress, and reactions

• Motivation: turning emotions into constructive energy

• Empathy: understanding the emotions and needs of others

• Social skills: interacting appropriately and influencing positively

  
  

The main benefits include:

• Improved interpersonal relationships: more authentic communication, fewer misunderstandings, and greater cooperation

• Stress and pressure management: emotionally intelligent people regulate their emotions better and avoid emotional outbursts

• Leadership and positive influence: they inspire trust, know how to listen, encourage, and create a psychologically safe environment

• Better decision-making: by integrating emotions as a source of information, they make choices with more discernment and objectivity

• Well-being and resilience: EI fosters emotional balance, self-confidence, and the ability to bounce back after failure

  
  

In summary, emotional intelligence is the invisible foundation of sustainable performance: it connects self-awareness, quality relationships with others, and adaptability three key skills in a constantly changing world.

Identifying Your Values

Our most important choices are often guided by our values: freedom, security, justice, creativity… Clarifying your values helps you better steer your life. Humanistic psychology, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), and coaching approaches all rely on this exploration to help individuals live in alignment with what truly matters to them.

Being aligned with your values promotes motivation, engagement, and enjoyment in your activities and ultimately well-being. Identifying and recognizing them is therefore a crucial step in the process of self-understanding.

A well-known exercise for self-knowledge and alignment, widely used at the Espé Career Center to help students build and optimize their professional paths, is IKIGAI.

IKIGAI is a Japanese term that can be literally translated as “reason for being” or “the joy of living.” It is a profound concept that encourages individuals to find meaning in their existence, identify what truly drives them, and pursue personal fulfillment across all areas of life.

IKIGAI is represented by four fundamental elements that intersect to form a harmonious balance:

• Your Passion : What excites you, makes you happy, and what you are passionate about.

• Your Mission : What you are good at, your skills, and unique talents.

• Your Profession : What the world needs and what you can be paid for.

• Your Vocation : What gives you a sense of contribution and social usefulness.

  
  

Recognizing Your Cognitive Biases

Cognitive psychology teaches us that our perception of ourselves is sometimes distorted: confirmation bias, stereotypes, categorization bias, overconfidence…

In “cognitive bias,” there are two words: bias and cognitive. Psychology isn’t complicated:

• Bias refers to an error, as we know.

• Cognitive relates to knowledge, understanding, or information.

  
  

So, a cognitive bias is ultimately a reasoning error caused by using a shortcut a quick, easy, automatic way of thinking.

They originate from the mental shortcuts our brain uses to help us react quickly and “automatically” in everyday life.

Cognitive biases are mechanisms that lead to “thinking errors” (hasty judgments, generalizations, preconceived or unverifiable ideas…). Becoming aware of these distortions allows us to see ourselves more clearly and make better decisions, especially in high-stakes situations.

Conclusion :

Knowing yourself is a journey, not a destination. Psychology does not offer absolute truths, but it provides tools, reference points, and methods to better engage in a dialogue with oneself.

At ESPE, we believe that this self-knowledge is a cornerstone of successful guidance, whether personal, academic, or professional.